sab kuch sunn hai...mujhe bas ek harkat ki talaash hai.....

kya ho raha hai mujhe mere khuda.......sunn si ho gai hu main aur mera vajood....main hu ki nahi...ya sirf hai....ek khokhli dastaan....mere raaste sunn ho gaye hain...ankhon me ab ansoo bhi sunn ho gaye hain.....dil main armaanon ke panchhi ke par bhi sunn ho gaye hain....kahin kuch khoya hai kya....ya maine sach mian kuch paaya hi nahi hai.....kya ho raha hai...kya ho raha hai khuda.....

insaan ka shareer to hai par..main baaki insaanon ki tarah kyu nai reh gai hu....kyu muje lag raha hai ki sab kuch band ho raha hai....ek ajeeb sa sannata hai......khwahish , use paane ka jazba, zindagi main kuch kar dikhane ka, maksad pane ka hounsla, sab kahan dhund main kho gaya...
ye main hi hu na ae mere khuda...jise tune is jahaan main bheja tha...
.par kya kare...ye zindagi.....sunn ho gai hai......

har din aise guzar jata hai ki khabar nai lagti.....shab aa hi jati hai akhir.....
ae mere khuda..bata de mujeh akhir teri marzi kya hai....meri is zindagi ki marzi kya hai?
kyu sab se choot raha hai mera vassta..? kyu andar hi andar simat raha hai vo junoon...
main chahti hu ki main apni is zindagi ko sahi tarah se fir se jee saku..bas...yehi maanga tha tujhse...
kabhi kabhi samajh nai aa paata ki kya ho gaya hai...sab kuch sunn lagta hai kabhi....jaise zubaan hi kat gai ho sabki.....ae khuda....tu hamesha apne nek shabd mujeh kehta rahe....mujhe ehsaas hota rahe ki tu sunn nai hai..ki.

mera khuda be-sunn hai...aur muje sun raha hai..meri museebat ko sun raaha hai aur muje keh raha hai...sabr kar....khud se ishq kar, khud ke andar ke khuda ko zinda rakh aur

usse beintehaa ishq kar.....fir sab or harkat hi hogi...aahat hi aahat hogi aur roshani hi roshani hogi ...................................

P.S.: The photo was taken from internet and is not my photo...

Literature Gathering-poem read out- Updated

Hi,
I don't know why I should not have written this post long time back (1 year ago), anyways, I wanted to share on my blog about something, which is more like an honor for me. It was the time when one of my English poems (Words of Pearl) whose theme was based on Persian culture was read in a literature gathering in Edmonton, Canada at University of Edmonton, by Mahdi, a member of the literature gathering. He printed out copies of my poem (with my picture :)) and read it out. I mention that it was more an honor because in that gathering, students generally read out poetries of great poets like Farough and Hafez!



(Picture sent by Mahdi! Thanks again!)

I have decided to post the full poem (it was written in English by me in April 2010). This poem was written from imagination and sheer magnetism of the culture my soul was recognizing at that time of my life...

Here is the poem (its technically not published in any anthology yet):

"

Your words of pearl

 

"O! My Prized possession

O! My Persian Pearl

This is you born in Esfahan.

My Pearl of Persia

My half of world.

I am standing in the bazaar in Esfahan

Waiting for you

And I hear your words from afar.

 

Sometimes,

Your words are like

The flavorful Kermani Gaz

Melting in my heart.

 

Or may be

Your words are like the

Sweet and scented Zafaran

Imparting colour to my white soul

 

Or may be

Your words are like the

Fragrance wafting in spring

Like the Persian rose

Like the Persian lime

 

Or may be

Your words are like the

Colors meeting my eyes

When meadow is full

Of daffodils, tulips, iris, hyacinth

 

Or may be

Your words are like the

Melody flowing

From Santoor

From sehtar

Like the

Symphony of peace

 

Or may be

Your words are like the

Zendeh River flowing

 Through the ragged curves

Of my ear, my body

Reaching my heart

Lying like the Yazd desert

And enlivening it finally.

 

Or may be

Your words are like the

Rich embroidery

On my Persian carpet

The magic carpet

From Esfahan.

 

Or may be

Your words are like the

Refreshing and pure breeze

Emanating from the Caspian Sea

 

Or may be

Your words are like the

Sacred quatrains

Of Hafez Shirazi

 

Or may be

Your words are like the

Chalices of wine

Intoxicating to core

 

Even amidst the clamour

And the labyrinth like paths

Of the Grand bazaar of Isfahan

Your words reach me.

 

The words of

Love on your lips

Are like the sacred fire

Burning since thousands of years

In the holy temple

In Chak Chak

And my lips

Becoming like the

Simorgh bird

When they meet your lips.

 

My Pearl, My prized possession.

We are like the two free

Gay goldfishes,

Going around

And around.

In the same

Glass jar."

 

----Shilpi, 14 April 2010

P.S. I realized that the photo of the part of the poem features a middle name for me, but I should clarify I do not have any middle name, nor is Niloufar (a Persian name of a female meaning blue water lily) my mother's name, as my mother was a Hindu and Indian.. I think it was some confusion as I had originally posted my poem in facebook (which I now don't even use as it's a scam application) with that name using more like a pen name, but its not my name or part of it :))

EVERYTHING IS PLANNED

Every being on the PLANet earth works according to a plan, that's what I have come to believe in.Well, most of us are working towards fulfillment of a plan consciously or if not so, are an inseparable entity in the whole plan of the planet earth and the life, unbeknownst to ourselves.
Picture this:

Plan for day,
Plan for the week,
Plan for the year,
Plan for five years ahead..!
Plan for life here
Plan for the hereafter..

It occurred to me in a flash, Even we were planned, isn't it..!! by our parents..( excluding those hapless children born out of unfavorable and forced circumstances)

Even God has a plan for us..!!
Everything is planned in this universe
Every thing works in a law and plan. EVERY THING..!! Believe it or not..!!


I wonder how planning is so imperative to the life of an individual.
As they say," If you are failing to plan, you are planning to fail."
True so, of late, I also embarked on the journey of making daily plans and prioritizing my tasks. For that, writing down to-do lists or using a calendar is the best thing I came upon.And I am happy I follow this process now quite properly and regularly and see most of my tasks now as a part of the universe, and not any burden hanging around. Make a plan today, no matter what it is, and pursue it with patience..! Pick up a notepad or any calendar or any good old thing you can lay your hands on and write down this very moment, what you want to do now. As it is said, writing down helps, it clears all the clutter in your mind.


Thank God, My blog post turned out exactly as I had planned..!! satisfying to the core!!

Dancing the dream

Currently reading the book:
Dancing the Dream,poems & Reflections
By
MICHAEL JACKSON

PUT OUT THE FIRE

It is 2:40 am in the night.I am walking on the Ludlow street and everything is silent. Darkness is resting upon the deserted roads.I stop walking and wait for the signal to turn to red from green, even though all street is deserted and i could have not cared about traffic rules, but after all it is USA and at this time of the night, I should be more careful.

Inside the paths of my mind , I feel lost and my soul is incomplete. My heart is on a fire insatiable and incomprehensible, burning away for unknown reasons.

Suddenly i hear a shrill sound and a fire engine flashes by in a hurry. I am careful to remain on the other side of the path.
The slender body of the engine goes away with glowing brilliant red and orange lights on it.I am still on the other side of the road, my feet frozen at the spot

A thought flashes in my mind. Somewhere, the firefighters shall be able to douse the fire where it occured, and rescue the people from the catastrophe.
But it is such a pity that the same fire engine cannot douse the flames rising in my heart and charring it away. I thus stand in wonderment.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Sometimes, it is so strange, that you have the solution-engine passing you by, when there is fire of questions and doubts in your mind, but sometimes, the solutions which work for one situation may not work for the other. Clearly, the fire in this heart cannot be extinguished by the enormous water tank of this big fire engine, but perhaps by something else.

Just then, I sat down on a bench close to the path and there was an endless flow of water, saline though. I realized i was crying endlessly to my hearts' desire. In some time, i felt mellowing of the fire in my heart as my eyes' engines emptied themselves in full fervor.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Many a times, the solution to a problem lies inside us. Just that we need to see it through egoless eyes.

MAZED MIND..

A voice banging in my head loudly and giving rise to these thoughts: Don't know why but since some months, my mind is in a maze, as if its not a human mind,but an animal's mind, emptied of all logic and sensibility in its entirety
. I don't mean in a pervert sense, but yes in a too impulsive and obsessive sense.
I am almost on the verge of giving up...

Giving up something , which agreed does not fulfills my heart desire and passion any longer, but surely it was something which I just cant shun away or discard right away, because it was won at too high a price, both in terms of money and time, labor and endeavor.



Another voice whispering:
Fight the convolutions of the mind and be strong..
I have to be strong...
I have to be strong...
There is a powerful force around me laden with positive energy , which is battling with negative energies emanating in my mind. I would like to call these negative energies to be clouds of confusions and convolutions..
The strong force girdling me is every time protecting me from downfall. Downfall of spirits and hope...And precluding my fall from grace..
Oh Lord, Grant me the grace to accept what I cannot and the courage to change what I
CAN...


Voices in a mind mazed...
voices rattling, some whispering..
but in the end if i hear with the heart of hope and the soul of silence, I can hear the wise voice...!! which is in form of whispers...!!!!!

The Green Deed

The Green Deed

Today, I planted a sapling for the first time in my entire life...!!
Never realized this small act could yield such pleasure, bliss and satiety. But more so, it instilled a sense of responsibility from inside - that sense which I had stopped sensing since some time. The small wooden enclosure outside my apartment with dark brown, rather blacker mud became the chosen spot for the “green deed”.
I went along with my kind roommate with a glass of water in hand and chalice of gladness in heart, and gently laid the roots of the sapling to the ground and buried them in the black mud thereafter. After resting it firmly, I poured water on it and patted the wet ground with my hands, and gave one last glance at it before making my way back to the comfort of my room in my apartment.


The sapling swayed in the gentle wind, remaining steady though. I felt my gaze locked on it for brief seconds, as I made my way away from it. I felt as if it whispered something in the winds’ ears...the words drifting towards me...the language of which was apparently undecipherable but the essence of the feelings translating into something like-

“Mama, you have rested me now
In my wet and soft black cradle,
Sung a sweet lullaby to me by your caring eyes
Your beautifully gentle hands have
Patted my forehead
You have quenched my thirst
By the water you gave me
I was abandoned
But you found me
And gave me a new life
I pray this life is nurtured by you
Every passing day.

With your daily cares
And affection-laden glances
Tokens of love
Making me feel wanted
Making me feel loved.
Just remember
To shower your pristine love on me
Tomorrow, And
Every passing day...”

As the last word reached my ears, I sensed my last tear reaching the corner of my dry lips. I took a long look at the tiny little sapling and blew a flying kiss at it and then looked towards the azure blue sky.
I prayed to the Sun God to never be too harsh on this sweet little sapling of mine, but be gentle when shining his glory upon it.
I beseeched the gay flock of birds flying above, to be caring and considerate towards my sweet little sapling.

I knew even before this sapling would grow up into an imposing tree, the sapling of care, love and responsibility grew into a full-blown tree in the wet soil of my heart, at that very instant, laden with flowers of wonder and bliss.
I went to my room
Turned off the lights
Drift to Land of Nod
Morn comes
I go along with the business of my life, walking past that sapling outside my apartment door.
Every passing day, I make it a point to remember to take care of this sweet sapling.
Every night, i pin my growing hopes and dreams to my new found little baby.

Somewhere, Mother Nature has begun her work...
On this small and naive baby, my sapling
Somewhere, Good Lord has begun His work...
On this small and naive heart, my heart.

FIREWORK

Recently, came across a song “Firework” by Katy Perry by chance, but the video, its lyrics, its music, its luminance and inspirational message kept on haunting me until I decided I should pen down my thoughts about it. This song actually featured as #1 in Top lists at the time it was released as well. The song was filmed in the beautiful city of Budapest in Hungary. The video is available on YouTube at this link: 
Katy Perry - Firework (Official Music Video)

The video of the song is pretty thoughtful as well and quite in sync with the message it portrays. Well, I did find couple of interpretations and symbolisms for the song, but then thought of posting my overall detailed analysis of this beautiful song called FIREWORK

The song has a lot of messages in it. It talks about how every human being is unique and “cannot be replaced”. In spite of one or several flaws, each one of us is worth on this earth and need not feel like a worthless and empty “plastic bag” drifted away by the wind.

The video features a young boy incapable of protest against his fighting parents, a small girl suffering from cancer and without any hair after chemotherapy, a bulky woman afraid to join the pool party of her friends, a gay unable to express his love and feelings to a guy in the bar and finally a young magician being intimidated by a gang of robbers.

Evidently, the common cord which connects all these souls is imperfection and fear stemming from that imperfection. All of them are afraid to take a step further because of their inhibitions which are holding them back and precluding their glory from shining brightly.

In other words, what Perry hints through her song is that in fact all of have a “spark” in us which needs to be ignited, either by self-determination and self-confidence, or through confidence pouring from others in our group.



In this video, Katy acts like the fountainhead of fireworks generating brilliant lights which help to ignite the latent spark in all of the above characters in the video. It is remarkable how each of them, then sheds their respective inhibitions and moves on to shine brighter than the moon. Even moon has a black mark on it and isn’t perfect, but still shines.

“You just gotta ignite the light
And let it shine
Just own the night
Like the Fourth of July”

One of the metaphors in the song which I find particularly striking is that of “owning the night, like the fourth of july”. These lines actually act like a clarion call to those characters and humanity in general, to set themselves free from the dark slavery of their fears and flaws and be independent, be ignited. Let the true colors of yourself burst through this night and like a brilliant firework shine to your glory and show your true colors and gain victory on the night which here again, refers to the darkness of the soul and the inhibitions.

Towards the end, the video also sends a message of unity of humanity as we see Katy dancing to the beautiful fireworks with a huge crowd where all of them are exuding lights and contribute to create a panoramic firework with brilliant colors. Thus, all of us, irrespective of our health, sexuality, age and ability should rise together in unity and let the colors harmonize to create a brilliant display of fireworks.
Lot of gems of inspiration are contained in this video and it asks every being to be optimistic in spite of all as “after a hurricane comes a rainbow”.

Los of references to colors in this video urge the humanity to accept that each one of us has the power to rise and shine and awe the world. Just as a lovely firework owns the night and glorifies it and ushers light, in the same way, all of us have the power to lighten this life and conquer the darkness within.